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SEAF yields 21st century etiquette questions [May. 2nd, 2009|04:46 pm]
Just me.
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We went to the Seattle Erotic Art Festival last night. There were a fair amount of people in "transgressive" dress, including fetish wear and gender-reversal outfits. There were several MTF trannies, not sure if they always dressed this way, or if it was just for the night.

So when I went to the women's bathroom, there were two MTFs in there checking their makeup. Okay.

I went into the stall, and as I sat down, noticed in the stall next to me feet in size 13 pumps pointed in the opposite direction, ie, someone with dude equipment standing in front of the toilet.

I wonder what Miss Manners would say about this?

Poll #1393867 Transexual restroom etiquette?

What is the proper action for MTFs using the women's bathroom?

Dudes who identify as women enough to use the ladies room should sit to pee
Dudes who identify as women enough to use the ladies room should pee however they like
Dudes who are in lady costume but don't identify as ladies should use the men's room
Ladies rooms should have urinals for ladies with dude genitals
some other solution

My main gripe is that if a dude is still enough of a dude to pee standing, he's probably enough of a dude to not lift the seat, or will otherwise make the ladies room as nasty as men's rooms tend to be. I understand being a MTF ladydude means giving up male privilege and that can be difficult, but I'm thinking that male privilege never entitled any dude to use public women's rooms and pee on our toilet seats.

What do you think?

(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: lara7
2009-05-02 09:00 pm (UTC)

the point is...

men cannot be trusted to not defile the commons.

oh, and women have to have some place to go and gossip for 5 minutes away from the menfolk.
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[User Picture]From: alanna_cooper
2009-05-03 09:18 am (UTC)
We had uni-sex bathrooms when I was deployed, and there were multiple stalls. Two instances I can think of had three stalls: 1 toilet, 1 toilet, and a stall of 3 urinals. One toilet was dedicated to females all the time, and the other toilet was for either sex. I used the "guy" toilet all the time and didn't find it grosser than the girl's one.

It was a weird cultural thing to get used to for me, though. Peeing next to my boss and all the other senior people who are inevitably male.
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[User Picture]From: holyoutlaw
2009-05-02 08:26 pm (UTC)
I'm in favor of anyone using the women's room sitting down to pee. I do that at home anyway, and it's surprising how much cleaner the bathroom is overall.
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[User Picture]From: lemur68
2009-05-02 08:59 pm (UTC)
You should have given this check boxes, as I agree with #2 and #3.
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[User Picture]From: ringbark
2009-05-03 02:55 am (UTC)
I agree, though my support is for #1 and #3.
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[User Picture]From: signifier
2009-05-03 09:45 am (UTC)
I suspect SEAF kind of operates under different rules than everything else, basically.
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[User Picture]From: puddinhed
2009-05-03 04:00 pm (UTC)
Women leave pee on the seat all the time when they squat. If everyone would just sit their butt down, we'd be able to avoid a lot of nastiness.
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[User Picture]From: repoman
2009-05-04 11:52 am (UTC)
There are tons of materials out there that are "tips" on being a successful transgender...and they all say if you dress like a gal, pee like a gal.

My favorite has to be how to order food like a woman. Men will say "I'll have the steak, medium rare with a baked potato." Women will say "Could I get the steak, cooked medium rare? And could I get a baked potato on the side with that?"
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[User Picture]From: capn_jil
2009-05-04 06:45 pm (UTC)
oh man

oh, man.
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