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Xmas rant: I am not you - The inexplicable charisma of the rival [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
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Xmas rant: I am not you [Dec. 3rd, 2004|12:28 am]
Just me.
In case you don't already know this, I am a 34 year old unmarried, non-cohabitating woman, with no children, and my nearest living relative lives 2677 miles away. From this you might (should?) conclude that 1) I don't always spend Thanksgiving or Xmas with my "family"
2) being a single woman, I am either too busy mackin' on guys (because I'm single, and that's what single gals do) and/or moping about having no boyfriend (because I'm single, and that's what single gals do) to do the kinds of things you people with SigOtters and/or families do during the holidays.

this means:
I do not cook a turkey for just me for Thanksgiving
I do not generally get an Xmas tree (although I have on occasion; I believe it was twice, in the last 10 years).
I do not hang a stocking by the chimney for me, and certainly not for my 2 cats, because I am not a pathetic single woman whose only friends are her cats.
I do not string lights on my shrubs for the neighbors to gawk at (as they already have plenty to look at what with the boat planter and the robot sculpture)
I do not buy Christmas CDs, nor play Xmas CDs I bought in prior years.
I do not own red sweatshirts decorated with quilted trees, reindeer, or snowmen with bells sewed on.

So I found it especially befuddling when a cow-orker from another department today strikes up a conversation 10 minutes into the workday with "So, have you decorated your house for Christmas yet?"

I said, politely but sternly, "Actually, I don't really celebrate Christmas".

She got very silent, as if I'd said "Actually, I slaughter orphaned kittens and eat them raw". Probably because she's a Christian (I know this mainly because had she asked me a year ago about how she would go about using the employee perk of ordering discounted books through our vendor to get a leather-bound Bible) and she probably figured I was either a Jew or an Atheist, and she'd never imagined that either of Those Kinds of People worked here.

Note that she didn't ask me if I decorated for Christmas at all, but if I'd done it YET (see High Fidelity, Evil Dead (or is it Evil Dead 2?) conversation on "yet" for further explication). That's what peeved me; even if I'm not a Jew, a Muslim, or an Atheist, why should I waste my time doing something as mundane and dull as seasonal house decorating?* Given my age and demographic, I should either be whoring about or desperately seeking a life partner rather than stringing popcorn or whatever the hell it is you people do to decorate your domiciles for The Holidays (tm).

I understand and am secure in the idea that I'm not a part of the dominant Amurikan culture; however, I thought the rest of those people would be able to detect this as well. The Somali chicks at Goodwill don't ask me how I'm enduring the Ramadan fast; why do suburban never-left-this-town PTA moms assume that a young single woman with a graduate degree and overdyed hair wants the same things out of life they do?

If I really wanted to screw with her, I'd tell her that the only way I celebrate Christmas is by participating in drunken Santa Rampages and giving bizarro toys to strangers. But I'm too considerate (and surreptitious) for that.

*not to disparage those of you who are *into* seasonal decorating, I'm talking about the idea of doing it because its expected because its What People Do.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: ringbark
2004-12-03 01:22 am (UTC)

yet

If left to me, I wouldn't decorate my house for Christmas either. What is the point? I ask this as a Bible-believing Christian. It might be fun for a day or so, but the drudge of decorating a house and then un-decorating it at what is already a busy time of year leaves me bewildered.
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[User Picture]From: lara7
2004-12-03 09:27 am (UTC)

Re: yet

exactly. I realize that not all Christians, nor secular "yay commerce!" Americans, feel that lawn Santas are part of their celebration, which is why her presumption got on my nerves.

I can see how it might be fun to decorate for the holiday if you have kids who are Into It. My "family" would be more impressed by me lowering the mini-blind cords so they can swat at them than they would wreaths, trees or lights.
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[User Picture]From: herbaliser
2004-12-03 06:56 am (UTC)
My boyfriend's father tried to give me a small ornamental xmas tree. I was horrified.
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[User Picture]From: noiseinmyhead
2004-12-03 02:45 pm (UTC)
To me Christmas decorating at least the outside lights and stuff is more about a festival of lights idea than a Christian one. I love Christmas lights bright and shiny and happy. A modern fire festival.
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[User Picture]From: lemur68
2004-12-03 02:50 pm (UTC)
I do not buy Christmas CDs, nor play Xmas CDs I bought in prior years.

Argh. I just don't understand why folks make a concerted effort to actually listen to Xmas music, when they don't have to because it's already all over the TV and radio and blaring out of speakers when you go outside or into a store....
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[User Picture]From: petdance
2004-12-03 02:51 pm (UTC)
because there are decent Christmas CDs out there that are not just the same ones you always get. In my house, we have this Stevie Wonder disc, and the Carpenters Christmas album, and some other seasonal faves.
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[User Picture]From: lemur68
2004-12-03 03:01 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I don't hear The Mackenzie Brothers' "12 Days of Christmas" or the "Jingle Cats Medley" on the radio, and the one holiday CD I own has those on there.
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[User Picture]From: lemur68
2004-12-03 02:55 pm (UTC)
Also, after mentioning the leather-bound Bible you also mentioned the Evil Dead, which also featured a sacred text bound in flesh. :D
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[User Picture]From: tawnyarocks
2004-12-04 12:50 am (UTC)
Yeah, but you didn't answer the question.... have you started decorating yet?

okay, I'm just being a bitchy bitch so I can ask if you know when the santa rampage is...
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[User Picture]From: lara7
2004-12-05 08:36 pm (UTC)

this saturday noon pike place meet at the pig

there's also a dinner stop/meetup at 7pm for evening santas, location TBA.
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