August 19th, 2002

menaked

A mean spirited and petty poll

All of the following examples are true and are actual characteristics of men I've seen naked ("seen naked" works better than "dated" for such a wide ranging cast of characters) Obviously, some examples are much worse than others, and all have been chosen for either their comic value or audacity. One person even got multiple mentions of his foibles, just because I could.

If you'd like to share similar red flag stories, feel free to leave a comment.

Poll #54474 Let's get petty!

Of the following, which of these things would be the biggest "red-flag" in a prospective date?

Currently has milk in the fridge that expired a month ago and is lumpy like wallpaper paste when poured down the drain.
3(10.0%)
Has a large collection of action figures still sealed in their original packaging.
5(16.7%)
Will not use his/her roommate's soap, since said soap has touched roommate's genital region.
3(10.0%)
Has a plastic bag on every LP and/or comic book owned, even the ones that aren't valuable.
1(3.3%)
Owns only one fork.
5(16.7%)
Owns an Eagles record.
1(3.3%)
Dropped out of high school.
12(40.0%)
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Surprising Poll results!

Wow. Interesting to know that dropping out of High School is a more awful thing than owning Mint In Box action figures. And that the lone fork is second. You folks always give me stuff to think about, and for that I thank you. But at least the guy with one fork can get with the program and buy more forks, whereas the rest of these are more difficult to correct.

For the record:
The high school dropout (dropped out in the last year, can't remember if he GEDed or not) was also afraid of the roommate's soap AND had a bag on every LP he owned, including stuff like "Whipped Cream and Other Delights", making him the red-flagging-est man to date.

It was RC who committed the sin of lumpy milk, which I discovered when preparing my coffee. He also had a carton of good milk in the fridge as well, and claimed the bad milk had just gotten pushed behind other things in his fridge and was then out of sight and out of mind. As RC, uncharacteristically for a bachelor, actually -has- a decent amount of food in his fridge, I'll be charitable and accept this explanation.

So to sum up, gentlemen:

Stay in school, check the milk, buy more forks.